~OMG~

I havent really talked to anyone about this before but during this period of break, when work is all done and finished, I find myself thinking bout Mom every single day. Basically whenever I'm alone thoughts of her will just creep into my head.

This might be kinda creepy but in the past i've actually dreamt of my Mom dying and my grandmother dying. I guess thats just my mind trying to prep itself for the worst case scenario. But all I had to do was wake up from the dream and everything would be alright. Now its just the reverse, I see my mom in my dreams all the time and I wake up to the nightmare that is reality.

I dont know if i've mentioned this before but I've always seen my Mom as the pillar of my life. Like no matter what happened, I could always tell myself: "hey you've still got a wonderful mom and a wonderful family, you're so lucky." Now I can't do that anymore and its just so tiring standing by myself with no pillar to lean on.

When I'm with friends and when I'm doing stuff its fine, I dont get to think too much but when I'm alone my mind just cycles through the same memories over and over again. Imangine what a Harry Potter fan would do when the whole H.P movie series end. Just keep watching the same titles over and over again, cos thats all he's got left.

And theres ALWAYS the icing on the cake.

Just heard from my sis, dad told her just now that he's found a girlfriend.

WOW.

How bout the icing ON the icing?

Shes PRC.

Haha. REEEEAAAAAAALLY emo post i know, I just had to get that out of my system, and hey, if you see this post and you see me or anything, dont be scared to ask if I "wanna talk about it" cos I might just do.